Saturday, November 2
We arrived at your garden at about 9 am.
The memorial park was filled with cars and people that day.
Here's the link to your Flower Garden 21 blog.
Grandma said, "Call one of the boys to help us clean up ..."
As soon as Grandma expressed her wish, would You believe it, but a young man with a nice face and a nice smile, came walking up towards our direction, with a cangkul (shovel) on his shoulder.
You must have sent him, Mom's sure of that.
Waving her hand, Grandma called out to him, "Hallo ... Hallo ... Hallo ..."
Hallo ... turned to look and gave Grandma a smile, as he walked towards us. :D
Grandma instructed him to trim the weeds all along the garden plot.
Itu semua potong, itu kasi bersih, ini buang sana ...
(cut those, clean that, throw there)
were some of your Grandma's instructions.
Suddenly, a creepy crawlie appeared from God-knows-where and crawled at top speed, from one end of the cemented plot, crossing near Mom's feet, before disappearing under the crumpled rag that she'd dropped in a panic when she saw that -- 100 legged worm.
It was a centipede.
Eeee -- yerrr ...
She'd let out a piercing shriek before jumping on to Grandpa's plot in a hurry.
Grandma turned to her sharply with a whispered warning, "Mai jiang la ...!" (Don't scream!)
Or ... she'd wake up the de*d???
Was that You, Daniel?
What a way to get your mother's attention.
Was that really You?
You'd greet Mom with that???
Mom suddenly found herself remembering the inciDAN last Sunday, October 27 -- with the gonggok.
Yeah, the gonggok.
Wait, wait ... let Mom tell You about the gonggok inciDAN.
Mom had called You on Call 502 : Sweetest Word on Saturday Oct 26.
Then, the next day on Sunday, in church ... she had found herself walking straight up to the front row of chairs (right wing outside church) and had stood there while the reading was on. A gonggok had slowly crawled in front of her. Yeah, it was like 3 inches away from your mother's feet. Make it two. Two inches away from Mom. Mom had backed away in horror (yeah, horror!). The gonggok slowly crawled away. Mom was gonna change her seat, if it came back, but it didn't.
During Communion time, because she was sitting on the front row, the Minister who was distributing the hosts was soon standing right beside her. On her right.
That close, honestly.
Consequently, she found herself hearing the line :
The body of Christ ...
The body of Christ ...
The body of Christ ...
The body of Christ ...
The body of Christ ...
more than 50 times. No kidding. Dad was not with her in church that Sunday. He was in Singapore, but taking the afternoon flight back. Justine was in school. Mom was with your two aunts, Megan and Uncle C.
So anyway, later in the evening, Mom asked Dad, "What do you call that worm, when you touch it, it curls into a circle?"
Dad said, thoughtfully, "Worm ..."
Mom replied, "The Malay name is gonggok, how to say it in English?"
Dad said again, "Worm ..."
This Dad ah, really no help there.
(Google says : roly poly) (just checked)
So anyway, Mom told Dad, "Remember a few months after Son left, we were at his garden, and there was a caterpillar that crawled on his headstone? It was going to go over his photo, we were like YIKES!!! ... the caterpillar stopped, and took a detour?"
See Call 63 : Furry Friend
Mom continued, "This morning in church, a gonggok crawled past me ... like to get my attention ... and then before I knew it ... I was hearing the BODY OF CHRIST like a hundred times ... the day before, I told Son, that the sweetest word in the world is a person's name ... and that Mother Mary wants everyone to call Her Son's name and not just say Allah ... Omg, can you see that he's responding to my call?"
Yes Ma, Mama Mary wants people to say Her Son's name, JESUS CHRIST ... :D
By people here, Mom means believers, disciples and followers of CHRIST.
Back to present ...
The gardener asked, "Di mana?" (Where is it?)
Screwing up her face with disgust, Mom pointed at the rag.
He lifted the rag, and the centipede kinda rushed out in a drunken, zig-zag manner, towards your headstone, and disappeared beneath it.
Aunty C saw.
We all saw it.
It disappeared ... into a small gap beneath your headstone.
So, end of centipede story.
Turn the page, please.
Now what was that???
It was something ... definitely something ... but she couldn't put a finger on it.
Nope, she could not see the picture.
We'll let it be for a bit and move on.
So anyway ...
Dad planted 21 stalks of flowers, and Mom lit 21 tealight candles.
Justine was supposed to play SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW ... but ended up not playing.
Never mind ... too many people around.
There was mass at 10 am by the chapel.
A small crowd had gathered.
The chapel is nearby your garden, about 10 walking steps away. Mom and Dad remained at your garden whilst Aunty C, Grandma and Justine went to join the people for mass.
Mom couldn't help admiring your candles.
She told Dad, "See all the 21 candles burning?"
That Saturday morning was a really nice day. No strong winds to blow out our flames.It was somehow therapeutic just observing the flames dancing to the rhythm of the soft breeze.
Your mother had taken the time to study the sky.
That day, there was a short -- very short -- pale, white trail across the sky, that was really -- nothing to shout about.
A plane had obviously flew past ... with no zap messages for her.
She didn't feel any zap to be honest ... unlike those few times when she had encountered the sky zaps. Now, those trails had been incredible. What happened, Son? Why is this trail so --- miserably short and --- cold?
Ah, she didn't know then, but it was meant for her to:
question it ...
ponder about it ...
and to remember it.
She looked away and decided to concentrate on the candles.
When mass ended, Grandma invited the Priest to come over to our garden to shower his blessings.
He saw the porcelain photos of Aunt Tracy and yours, and said, "So young. Who is this?"
Who are they, he meant of course.
Mom replied, "That's my sister ... my son ... and my father ..." as she pointed to each of the 3 headstones.
"What happened to them?" asked Father.
Nobody said anything, even Grandma was silent, which was rather surprising.
Father asked again, "What happened to them?"
Mom said flatly, "They all had cancer ..."
It was time to leave.
We walked to the car.
As Dad was driving out, he stopped at a small T - junction. The lanes were all narrow, thus allowing only one way traffic.
Left, right, center, in front, behind of us were tombstones and grave yards. How that could feel peaceful, Mom will never know ... but it did ...
Grandma said, "Turn right, turn right ..."
We saw a trail of cars driving up, on the right. Obviously, we had to wait for all the cars to pass before we can even turn right.
Get the picture?
Meanwhile, Mom was casually looking around. There were many people, here and there, attending to their ALL SOULS thing.
Her attention was drawn to a woman, holding a rather large over-sized black umbrella and a black paper bag carrier. The woman was in front of us, some 10 steps away. You can't miss her if You were sitting in front in the car, like Mom and Dad were.
Our car was still stationary ... we were waiting for the right lane to clear.
Mom saw the woman take a turn, and when she did ...
Her heart skipped a beat.
"Look! Look! Jack Daniels. The black bag ..." Mom said to Dad, pointing at the woman ahead of us.
The time was 11:13 am.
Decode : 24
Dad saw ... at the same time, he made a turn to the right. Mom did not have the time to snap a photo of her eviDANS. It was a plain black carrier bag, with only the name JACK DANIELS on it.
She was meant to see that for sure.
Her 3rd zap.
ZAP ZAP ZAP.
You'll just have to take her word for it.
Her only eye - witness : Dad
She had to smile.
Of course, her son would be near.
How could she even doubt that?
Mom said to Dad, "When we came, we had a 21 ... and now going home ... 24 ..."
A familiar song was playing on the radio.
Forever young, I want to be forever young ...
Mom said under her breath, "Forever young ... forever fifteen ..."
A sad sigh.
Her 4th zap for the day.
Yeah, FOREVER YOUNG is definitely counted. It came on just as we were leaving your garden? A clear zap.
We drove out of the Memorial Park.
And so Ladies & Gentlemen, that ... was the morning of ALL SOULS' DAY.
At home, Mom went straight to the computer. She wanted to download all the photos taken at your garden and to upload them onto your Flower Garden 21 blog.
As she was waiting for the photos to be uploaded, she checked the blog's last posting.
Your 37th month ... was her last post.
In that post, she had posted a video :
Sometime in the afternoon, Mom put on the DVD entitled MY SISTER's KEEPER.
Mom has not watch this movie before, but she remembers Aunty Diana telling her that Aunty D watched it on the plane on the way back from visiting You in Lourdes, and Aunty D had cried throughout the flight.
"It's so like your story ... the child has cancer ... the mother is a lawyer ... the father's name is Bryan ... there's the aunty in the picture ..." Aunty D had summarized for her. Aunty C had told her not to tell Mom about the movie and so Mom has not heard of that movie, not that she had time to watch movies then anyway, until after You left us.
Mom borrowed the DVD from Aunty D, after coming back from the garden.
Aunty D asked, "Are you sure you want to watch that?"
Mom said, "Yes, I have to ... "
She has to.
It's ALL SOULS' DAY ...
She will do whatever it takes to remind her of the pain ... because it is the pain that keeps her son close to her.
Nobody's gonna understand what she just said.
Oh, for cryin' out loud, she herself doesn't understand what she just said.
She made herself comfortable on the carpet, by propping herself up with lots of pillows. The air-con was on. She'd covered herself with your zoo animals quilt. Yeah Son, that quilt is still here. Justine was sleeping on the sofa and Dad was at the computer (near your mother). We were all together when that movie was on.
Shortly after the movie started, there was a scene where the song TINY BUBBLES was playing in the background. That made Mom sit up.
We used that song for our Full Day concert item last year.
After that, Mom found herself watching the movie -- very carefully.
Mom's not gonna go into the movie. You have to watch it yourself.
The movie ended with the cancer girl -- gone -- and the closing words of the narrator:
"Our relationship continues."
Mom said out loud, "Omg ... Heard that? Our relationship continues ... It's true. Our relationship continues."
Her 5th zap.
Thank You Son, for reminding Mom that our relationship continues, even after one's gone up to heaven. That sure is reassuring to hear ... on ALL SOULS' DAY.
Evening time ...
On the evening of ALL SOULS' DAY, we were supposed to go out for dinner.
At first we, Dad, Justine, Uncle KL (Dad's brother who is a guest in our home for a few days) and Mom were supposed to meet your aunts and Grandma for dinner at Gardens Mall.
When 7 pm came, we aborted dinner plans for reasons too long to mention here, and went to Bangsar instead.
Note the detour.
Something (correction, someone) was calling us to go to Bangsar.
Teng teng teng ...
At Bangsar Mall, Dad had to drive round and round and round and round and round, before we finally found a space to park.
Hmm, Mom could smell a -- spaghetti marinara -- somewhere.
Note the delay.
It was intentional, she could sense.
He son is preparing a zap, yeah ... she could feel it in her bones.
But what? And when?
Oh, it would soon reveal itself.
There would be two, if it were from her son.
He would be whispering to her.
The timing must be perfect.
We went up the escalator.
Mom suggested that we had dinner at the Chinese restaurant.
There was a queue at that restaurant.
We didn't want to queue up.
Justine suggested Ben's on the ground floor.
Dad said okay.
Just as Justine and Mom stepped onto the escalator to go down, Dad called us.
At the ground floor, we went up again. :D
Remember how Justine and You used to do that? Go up and down the escalators? :D
There was a Japanese restaurant beside the Chinese restaurant.
Uncle KL and Dad were studying the Japanese menu, as Justine and Mom approached.
To cut a long story a little bit shorter, we ended up in the Japanese restaurant, which was next to the Chinese restaurant.
The menus came.
We gave our orders.
Whilst waiting for the food to arrive, Mom thought she would pop over to the bookstore, which was next door to the Japanese restaurant.
She related her intention to Dad and received a cold, narrowing-of-eyebrows stare for her effort.
Dad turned to her before whispering through his teeth (not many people can do that, by the way), "Go later ... don't be rude ..." :D
We're not sure if Uncle KL heard that.
Mom sipped her hot tea.
Sip sip sip.
Sip sip sip.
Sip sip sip.
Engage in small talk.
Sip sip sip some more.
Then all of a sudden, she found herself sitting up right.
You can't be serious ...
You cannot be serious ...
Music was in the air.
It was the introduction of a song ... she knows that song ...
THERE YOU'LL BE that was coming from the overhead sound system.
There You'll Be ???
Are You kidding her?
What are the chances ???
She glanced at the time on the dashboard.
It showed 8:21 pm.
Decode : 44 : 21
ZAP ZAP ZAP.
Her 6th zap. Did she not see the THERE YOU'LL BE video on your blog this afternoon whilst downloading the photos?
Talk about coinciDANS.
Oh by the way, talking about coinciDANS ... this word coinciDANS was mentioned like THREE times in that movie (MY SISTER'S KEEPER). Another reason why she paid so much attention to the story.
At the table, Dad and Mom exchanged a knowing smile.
Oh Wow. You must have whispered to Dad to make sure Mom did not leave the restaurant, but to remain in her seat. She would have definitely missed that zap had she stepped out to go to the bookstore.
Oh Gee Wow.
What a precious moment that was.
We felt You right beside us, Daniel.
You were definitely with us.
Everywhere you guys are, there I'll be ...
For always, Ma ... :D
Mom listened to the song with a happy smile. She was just reminded of that song earlier in the afternoon on your blog. You really know how to lead your mother from one zap to another. That really is super awesome, Son. :D
In my dreams, I'll always see you soar above the sky
In my heart, there'll always be a place
For you for all my life
I'll keep a part of you with me
And everywhere I am, there you'll be
Yes Daniel ...
Everywhere we are, there you'll be. <3
What a wonderful reminder to us, Son ...
The food soon came.
For the next half and hour or so, we enjoyed our meal and engaged in casual conversation.
After dinner, Mom insisted she wanted to go to the bookstore.
We all went next door.
Uncle KL stayed outside -- texting.
Dad, Mom and Justine were in the bookstore.
The next zap was meant only for your family, Mom realize now on hindsight.
At the entrance, Mom checked some children's books that were on promotion.
She felt like buying all the books.
Shortly after, she walked over to one of the shelves.
There were rows and rows of children's books.
She pulled out a book - randomly - and couldn't believe her eyes when she saw the cover.
By the way, this was the first book she pulled out from the second row of books of that shelf.
Do You see what she saw?
The creepy crawlies.
Oh gosh, what are the chances? The centipede this morning at your garden.
Good Lord, what a coinciDANS.
What on earth made her pull out THAT book?
Her 7th zap. It made sense then why we encountered that centipede inciDAN that morning ... and by the way, it must be mentioned that it was Mom who first saw the centipede.
Putting the book back, she walked to the back of the store. There were some text and activity books all arranged neatly on the shelves. She noticed one book that was out of place, and was lying on top of the row of books.
Mom picked the book up. Flipping through the pages, she found herself blinking at one point.
She thought she saw the word : centipede.
Flipping back to find that page, she soon did.
Yes, it was an essay on centipedes.
Honestly, what are the chances? That book was entitled ESSAYS ... or something to that effect. Mom did not take a photo, it was surreal.
Honestly, too good to be true. She knows what You're thinking though. You wanna make sure Mom knows the zap is from You ... and so she needs to see TWO.
Shaking her head in happy disbelief, she walked over to the magazines. Picked up a HELLO, that reported on Kate's new post-natal body. Wow, she had thought as she looked at Kate Middleton on the cover.
Kate really looks great.
Mom started to read the article ... when several minutes later, she heard a familiar song coming on the overhead speakers. She looked up from her magazine and saw Dad coming towards her, with a big smile on his face.
He was pointing upwards (to the song).
Would You believe it but the song DANIEL had come on to fill her senses.
Oh my gosh ...
Mom pulled out her mobile and saw the time.
It was 9:27 pm.
Decode : 14
It has to be.
Her angel number.
I AM NUMBER 4.
That was the ultimate zap of the day.
Her 8th zap.
Daniel is traveling tonight on a plane ...
Gosh, even the cartoon plane has her angel numbers.
It suddenly dawned on her ...
Wait a minute ...
The white trail at the garden this morning.
The one that did not feel like a zap then.
Was that connected?
Connected la, Ma ... <3
Her instincts told her it was. :D
Or was that her son whispering into her ears?
Omg ... to hear the song DANIEL, after THERE YOU'LL BE ... was unbelievable.
Nothing would have prepared Mom for that -- amazing -- feeling.
It was just awesome.
Dad and Mom were grinning from ear to ear.
Mom sent a text to your sister, "DANIEL is on ..."
Mom wasn't sure if Justine was still in the bookshop, or had stepped out.
As your mother was walking towards the entrance / exit, she saw your sister reading her mobile -- probably your mother's sms. Haha.
Jus heard it.
Your family heard it together.
ALL SOULS' DAY -- she would have to say in her journal that night that, she received plenty of zaps that day.
Dad, Mom and Justine heard THERE YOU'LL BE and DANIEL together ...
Our relationship continues ...
We love You, Daniel ...
Keep the zaps coming ...